Elizabeth Potts Weinstein » intuition

Deep Breaths: Taking Leaps, Making Epic Mistakes, Learning and Moving On…

Shelly Gibbens — Mon, 07 Jun 2010 11:11:56 +0000

I had all these great thoughts for this post… I live my life honestly… I always live my truth… I always have… and… that is where I called bullshit on myself.

I have always known the right thing to do. I have terrific intuition… but I haven’t always followed it… and sometimes have just downright punched it in the face and jumped feet first into something I shouldn’t do.

In retrospect, looking back over every decision I’ve made that I just KNEW was wrong, I realize that I ignored my gut… I knew the correct decision, but for reasons ‘explainable’ at the time – but not now – I didn’t go with what I knew to be true in my heart, head and soul.

I’ve made many mistakes… Epic mistakes… Novel worthy mistakes… I’ve taken many deep breaths and cried so hard at times, I literally passed out…

But here is the best part about that… yes there is a best part…

I paid for every one of my mistakes. I took responsibility. I learned. I grew. I became ME.

AND 99.9% of the time, I actually like me.

Now for the longest and most stressful lesson I’ve had…

Thus far, in my career, I have gotten by… lived one day, week, month, and year at a time, ‘content’.

Or at least that is what I told myself.

I enjoyed the paycheck of a steady job, definitely, but 90% of the time, I did not enjoy the people and became easily bored with the work.

Dealing with people that wouldn’t do their jobs, and knowing I would get stuck doing them…

Sitting in a cubicle, and eventually an office, that held no creative flow for me…

Working without clear focus from the ‘leads’ of the projects …

Long, boring, mostly useless meetings…

All the while, in between stifling yawns and trying not to roll my eyes, I would just take deep breaths.

Until one day I couldn’t breathe at all… and I resigned.

No plans, no backup, no thoughts… just very loud yelling and cussing from me directed at the latest in a line of useless people trying, incorrectly, to tell me what to do.

(I did apologize… “I’m sorry for yelling, that was unprofessional and inappropriate… but I do NOT apologize for what I said.”)

My household lost 2/3 of our income because of my decision. That is a very hard thing to live with. We didn’t budget and plan. Decisions I make now about my work are amazingly epic for my family. I could very well fail at changing my focus and my career… and that doesn’t just affect me anymore.

So my truth in business is all new to me. Unless I am about to lose my house, and still maybe even then, I do NOT want to work for a big corporation ever again. I want to get projects DONE. I want to make things work. I want to create. I want to work for ME for a change.

And that is what I am doing… and it does scare me, but it also thrills me.

Then there are the fun, growing, enjoyed those experiences lessons

Those lessons that we file under love… Most of them aren’t love, they are excitement, curiosity, passion, lust (and YES, there is a difference in those things) and companionship.

Love, wow… my truth in love…

This could be a saga…. But I will spare you…

I have been hurt, but not because I was in love, more because I needed something at the time that was being taken away from me.

I have hurt people… not on purpose, but because I couldn’t live the lie anymore.

Even in junior high school, I never said “I love you” to boys because I knew it was special and I would only say it to those people who really deserved it. (Only one man has gotten that out of me.)

Every single man I’ve dated until this point, I knew I wouldn’t marry. I got what I wanted from the relationships and so did they… I can honestly say that I could call up every man I ever dated and have a conversation with them today, and I love that… Lets me know I met some awesome men, had some good times and made a friend on some level. I almost convinced myself a few times that I could marry one or two of them, but in the end, I was right…

I was right in those first minutes and hours of meeting them. I knew. Really, we all know… we just ignore it sometimes because it’s fun. There is so much truth to the title “Mr. Right Now”.

So the night that I met my husband, I was enthralled… and when he kissed me goodnight at my door, I closed the door and said “I’m going to marry him.” It’s only been five years, but I’m still feeling that… Mr. Right.

So what have these lessons taught me?

They have taught me to question, to listen, to follow my intuition. Before making decisions… get the facts, take a deep breath, LISTEN to my instincts, and do what I feel is right.

I question my role as a mother daily. Am I doing the right things? But I finally realized that I am a great mother, because my son is an awesome person. I have to tell him no, and get mad when he does stuff that is dangerous or disrespectful because he has to learn, I have to teach him. I also know that I have to do everything in my power not to change his personality, let him become the boy, the MAN that he is meant to become.

I question my role as a wife… but I ask my husband and get feedback… and I give it too J

I’ll get back to you on the business truth… since I’m learning as I go… But for now I am jumping in, making choices and listening to my gut.

As for the life and love truth, this is what I have learned…

Friends and family are the most important things in life. Period.

I don’t allow negative people to be a part of my life.

I’m honest. Everyone knows “Don’t ask me a question that you don’t want the answer to” (I do sometimes give strangers and new ‘friends’ a slight break on the bluntness of my answers though)

Mindless drone work is not for me. I am bored easily, and I need to be challenged.

I can’t write the novel of my epic mistakes, because I don’t want to admit the bad decisions publicly.

I’m a hard person to get to know because I hold a lot back, not everyone deserves to know the details of my life… but if you become a friend to me, I am loyal and fiercely protective.

I’ve learned that if you have good people around you, you will thrive… you will help them thrive… and that is the truth.

After 42 years of making these mistakes, paying for them and moving past them, I have learned a few things. I’d like to share them with you now. They are obviously just my thoughts and opinions <<

I’m very aware that a lot of people won’t take strong advice to avoid something, mainly because they need to learn things for themselves… but here goes:

When you’re about to do something, or someone ask you to do something, and you pause, or get a weird feeling… LISTEN TO IT.

If you are dating someone and you break up in the first 4 months… Don’t get back together, it is not right and it will not work… (Yes, that may seem like an arbitrary time, but it’s not…)

If you are fighting with a family member or friend… if it’s petty, let it go. The best way to determine if it’s worth fighting about is to think… “If they die tomorrow, will I regret not making up with them?” (Forget the anger, think about the relationship before).

If there is someone in your life that always puts you down, doesn’t support you (emotionally) or hurts you… get them out of your life. This obviously depends on the situation and the other person’s willingness to modify their behavior, but sometimes, this is the only viable option.

Don’t stay in a job doing something you don’t love.

True friends are rare, hold on to those you have.

The truth always comes out eventually.

I’ll repeat, trust your intuition… It is a culmination of your experiences, common sense, and in my opinion, your guardian angel talking to you.

About Shelly Gibbens: Shelly is a busy working mommy, computer geek, diver, skier, advid debater, writer, and organizer. You can find her as @randomshelly on twitter or read her blog.

What Does It Mean to “Live Your Truth?”

Elizabeth Potts Weinstein — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 21:14:00 +0000

I talk about Live Your Truth all the time (it’s even tattooed on the inside of my wrist!), and every so often someone actually asks me straight out, “what do you mean by live your truth?”

As I’ve said many times, I can’t tell you what it means to live your truth.

Because it’s your truth.

Not the truth. Not my truth. Not the truth written by the gurus or dictated by institutions or governments or your parents.

But your personal truth.

Now, that’s all nice and good, but you may want a little more freaking direction than that.

I define “living your truth” in two different ways … one is the mission of my company, and other other is my personal definition & the tools I use to apply it in my life.

Live Your Truth empowers solo-entrepreneurs to make a greater contribution to the world and become more successful & fulfilled by doing what is a natural extension of who they really are.

(thanks to Ken Moorhead for yanking this out of me during a late night consulting session)

But that’s not *my* truth and it’s not *your* truth … that’s just what I’m doing here in this business.

Living my truth is about begin 100% myself 100% of the time, about speaking the things that everyone thinks but no one says, about choosing to be uncomfortable every day, about being a visible leader of this movement.

But what could Living Your Truth mean to you?

During the first weekly #lytchat (live your truth twitter chat) we discussed this very question, and here are some of the responses:

idance_iwrite: Actively letting go of what other’s want from you and listening to your ‘inner voice’
JanieC: letting the real and best you out of it’s hiding spot
LisaMHines: Being courteous to others, but not letting them persuade your actions, words, etc.
kymleeisawesome: knowing what you are & are not responsible for. not doing anything that doesn’t fit your vision for yourself
tarufisher: For me, #LYT is saying “no” when I mean “no”, and “yes” when I mean “yes”.
ACCompanyC: disregarding the “shoulds’” – or at least questioning why should I?
LisaMHines: LYT means staying in a centered place, honoring my true self in everything I do.
JanieC: getting rid of barriers, real and imagined
bethearle: For me it’s living my values
JennaAvery: Having the courage to say what I mean, mean what I say, do what I love, and love what I do, in all things.
bethearle: practicing outwardly what my inner self knows intuitively
lizschneider: keeping soul-level promises that i make to myself.
jaladesigns: 4 me, its simply just being myself instead of trying 2 b perfect. It’s living & operating w/ honesty, integrity & decency.
lorilatimer: Doing what’s right for me, not what anyone else thinks or wants
lizschneider: Living my truth means, “walking my talk”, speaking what I think and doing what I speak
truthlifecoach: It’s about honoring my core values and trusting my “gut”
jhaubein: Being yourself no matter what others might think of you. Staying true to your values.
daniellemmiller: making sure my purpose and values are not compromised by my head worrying about what others think
jenngbob: Living my truth means not feeling guilty for doing what I intuitively feel I should be doing right now
ChristineVenart: For me, living my truth means to show up as myself always, push myself past my fears, and to say the hard truth
kymleeisawesome: not being afraid to take that leap of faith, facing down the fear and moving forward into uncertainty
lorilatimer: It also means saying “no” when that’s what’s best for me – something I didn’t used to do
KyraHowell: Living my truth means knowing my vision and allowing that to be my life.
m_michael: Living my truth: Being fearless w/o recklessness
YourGoToGuy: Simply doing instead of worrying.
daniellemmiller: complete trust in my intuition and “gut”
chrisarcucci: speaking & living my truth with compassion and clarit
lorilatimer: Getting out of my head and listening to my heart/intuition
bethearle: not following the crowd/ marching to my own drum
MarySchaefer: Giving myself permission to be BIG and small and loving myself in any state

So … I’d love to hear your thoughts & ideas, by you commenting below …

… do any of these resonate with you? What do the words “live your truth” mean to you?

And, we love for you to RSVP and join us for the next Live Your Truth twitter chat (#lytchat) - it’s free and open to anyone to join (yes, to participate in the conversation you need a twitter account). See you there!