Why I Never Want to Be Called a Guru … part 1

Why I Never Want to Be Called a Guru … part 1

Posted on 30. Oct, 2009 by Elizabeth Potts Weinstein in Videos

Have you been told you need to become a guru or an expert to build your business or speaking career?

That you must reduce access to you (not answer your own phone, not answer your own email, not speak to people at your events, have someone else manage your ) in order to appear successful? That you must distance yourself from your people / / tribe?

So … how’s that working for you? Not that great, eh? Yeah. Exactly.

[If you can't see that video, go here]

What do you think? Are you sick of guru’s? How do you want to engage with your people?

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  • A client with some knowledge of Sanskrit told me that the root meaning of "guru" is someone who guides you from darkness into light ('gu'=dark, 'ru'=light). That resonates with my own sense of calling, and has a dash of whimsy that pedestrian "expert" lacks. No interest in having an entourage, either.

    Further, speaking of wardrobe malfunctions, nobody will question why I'm running around in a bathrobe in my old age. That's just an accepted part of guru personal branding.
  • heidialexandrapollard
    Gosh I so relate to this - after flying all the way to the US from Australia - yes 18 hours travel I found the guru I went to see and listen to strangely distant and not just from me - from the entire audience - apart from the odd staged audience mingle for the cameras it did feel like there was an invisible barrier shield put up between us all. And then at the VIP party we paid to attend the guru spent the night on a balcony overlooking the party - why not come down and join in the fun and be part of something you inspired. I think they've (their team and they) have overthought the celebrity brand bit a little too much. Ho hum wish I had been able to attend a couple of years ago when it would have been more intimate and face to face.
  • Great video! Love how authentic you are and your points about being accessible and building relationships. People buy from those they like and trust. Those they have relationships with. They don't want to do business with people who they cannot reach or relate to. I have an assistant, but she does NOT respond to my email, my voice mail or any of my social media accounts. She is not me and thus cannot communicate the same way.

    I do get her to follow up, to remind me to get back to people, to let me know what is important etc. I use her to assist me in growing my business. The top priority thought, the relationships, the wins and losses with my clients are 100% mine.
  • talentdiva
    Great post Elizabeth. I so hate the term "Guru". While we're at it let's add diva, king and queen to that list. I tend to take someone's opinions and expertise more serious when none of those titles are attached to their names. It's most prevalent in the social media realm. EVERYONE and their momma is a guru/queen/king/diva. This may sound crazy from someone who's bog and Twitter use the term "diva". But when I originally set those up, I broke my own rule of branding. But I in no way refer to myself as any of those terms.

    And while we're "venting" (LOL) can we talk about these people who purposely make themselves inaccessible? If I'm paying for access to them, I don't want a delegate in their place and I damn sure don't want someone who's going to pawn me off to someone else.
  • Hi Elizabeth,

    Enjoyed your video on guru detox.

    You're right, the divide recreates the corporate corner office syndrome, which made even the occupant feel lonely. I think we're trying to move toward a more loving work world where everyone's valued for that unique X factor that each one of us was put on the planet to share. If one adopts that philosophy, then no one's better than anyone else. Much thx. Giulietta, Inspirational Rebel
  • marieforleo
    Great effin job baby. You know I'm SO down with you on this topic. I'm grateful for the mass divide because the new economy will have the "shakedown" effect.

    BTW - love your end bloopers. So killer. :) oxo M
  • Thanks Marie, I knew you'd get me on this. :)
  • You nailed it right on the head! And do u mind if I call you Liz? There's just a lot of myths where people believe you must be that guru or expert when in fact, it's a bunch of B.S. I mean for god sakes, there's people out there with great followings (and making great money) talking about and selling some of the weirdest stuff.

    We should, just be us and not "claim" any of these statuses. I'm with ya on the whole guru thing. Expert is nice but again, I think that all goes by what people you have actually helped out, think of you, your products and services.
  • and really, being an expert isn't about what you call yourself, it is about what other's perceive. as soon as I stopped "calling" myself guru/expert/etc. ... that's when other people started calling me one. ;)
  • The Golden Rule rules....You rock.
  • (see, I told you that you could use the word "rock" and pull it off!!)

    ;)
  • "Gurus" who aren't accessible to people end up becoming arrogant and eventually defeat the purpose of whatever their message is. I agree with everything you say. I didn't know "gurus" teach people who want to be coaches that way. If so, I am glad I never took any of those coaching classes.
    The world is moving towards empowerment for everyone. Why do you have to be above everyone else? There is enough for everyone if more cooperation were involved. Everyone can enjoy the pie.
  • Yes, cooperation & collaboration are the ways the world is moving (and actually, are the ways it has always been ... so many people just didn't get it)
  • Elizabeth, you are once again so breathtakingly gutsy! Thanks for this anti-guruification message, for two reasons. The first reason is that I once read a book called "If You See the Buddha on the Road, Kill Him" -- the message was that you can learn from lots of people but ultimately you are responsible for yourself and nobody else can tell you how to live your life. I loved that your video reinforced that message. The second reason (and the one that may have contributed to you feeling a bit sick to your stomach) is that you punctured the balloon, you said "The Emperor Has No Clothes," to some well-known high- profile individuals. I applaud you for telling it like it is. Thank you! Bonnie
  • yeah Bonnie, you know *exactly* what I was feeling. ahem.
  • I'm gonna break away here and way that there's a difference between being an expert and being a guru - perhaps because part of my coaching is that I believe people need to find an area of expertise that matches their passion and pursue it. :-)

    Indgulge me for a sec...

    When I conjure up an image of an expert, I see those way-cool college profs that EVERYONE loved because not only did they know their stuff, they had a passion or communicating it to etheir studets - would stay after class, and actually connect with them in an effort to really make the lesson sink in to our otherwise distractable brains.

    I think about the nerdy, on-air guest expert that has a deep understanding about a topic, but ISN'T shrouded with so much inapproachability that no one could ever get them on the phone for comment (or that they'd only appear if they were being interiewed by Larry King).

    To me "expertness" and "guru-ness" (better than guru-fication?) are not the same thing.

    I don't think of you as a guru. I DO think of you as an expert, as I do Chris, Gary and Scott Stratten.

    Hey, we need more ladies on that list, don'tcha think? :-)

    There's my two cents. Stepping down from the soapbox now. You may resume your regularly scheduled blog posts.
  • Lisa -

    I agree that expertise is a totally different energy than guru-ness. I also appreciate being put in the same bed as Chris, Gary & Scott. (hum, that sentence came out w/ an interesting visual, eh?)

    For me one big difference is "calling" yourself and expert and just "being" an expert. And that's the point I was making when I included the word "expert" in this video.

    I also totally have a thing for the way-cool college professor expertise type. (wait a minute, also getting some interesting visuals there ....)

    And thanks for your kick-a**-ness as always, Lisa. ;)
  • Good video. I think in the classic sense the journey up a mountain, or after a fast, or to Delphi to seek the wisdom of a "guru" might HAVE been part of the learning process. The purpose of the access or rituals for the seeker was to give focus and importance to the message from the Wise. The seeker might not have been ready to receive the information until you had traveled or prepared properly.

    Today, if I am seeking the input of an expert or guru and paying for that input, I have already exhausted other options and am 'ready' to receive. Often Companies will listen carefully to outside consultants merely because they are paying for the advice, even if it was the same advice the insiders had been shouting heedlessly already.

    I agree access is everything when I want coaching or advice. I would never contract for advice from someone who doesn't value me enough as a customer to provide the time and access I am paying for.
  • Bruce - it is interesting how often the value we get from the coach/expert/guru is the journey, the process we go through to get to them. The very act of hiring/paying for/traveling to see that person is what gives us the benefit. And really, as a coach myself, sometimes I feel I don't really *do* anything except listen to people and repeat back to them what I heard them say ... people do all the work themselves, when it comes down to it.
  • remarkablogger
    YEAH! Right on. And it's not like there are no examples of success with the "anti-guru" strategy of just being real and being accessible. Ever hear of Chris Brogan? Gary Vaynerchuk?

    Great video!
  • Exactly, those are two of my personal examples, Chris I just met in real life this past weekend & he was awesome. Both @chrisbrogan & @garyvee are totally rocking the un-guru-ness strategy, with high-accessibility, humility, and real-ness. Love it.
  • Interesting, @remarkablgger. Just looked up the first guy on twitter, but did not find Gary.
  • You are the smartest woman in the world. That's my comment.
  • You win the best comment award. ;)
  • Watch for the increasing wardrobe malfunction. It's awesome (and why this video is not being posted here in HD).
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